Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Overthinking Terrible: Woody Allen's Anything Else

Anything Else was so bad that it forced me to question whether I actually like anything Woody Allen has actually done.  This is partially because it's been years since I've seen a Woody Allen film, during that time when I actually paid attention to movie books and tried to keep pace with the hipster towards important films.  Anything Else, unlike the film's incompetent psychologist, peeled away my mental layers until I had to face uncomfortable truths, like David Mitchell in Peep Show:

"Did I really enjoy watching Annie Hall?  Or was I just bamboozled by what all those movie books said how he captured the New York lifestyle?  I don't even like New York.  Or do I say I like him because I'm afraid I'll sound like an anti-semite?  But I like Mel Brooks without hesitation!  Oh no, my series is getting increasingly darker and less humorous!"

Ultimately, I faced my demons and still laughed at Annie Hall clips on youtube ("why don't you get William F. Buckley to kill the spider?"), but my insecurity operated from the fact that Anything Else, unlike other modern Allen movies I've disliked such as Match Point, operates like some gibbering, half-formed clone of a classic Allen film.  All the elements are there: performer-based improvisional comedy, New York eccentricities, sly reference humor.  The problem is that Anything Else takes these concepts and reduces them to their lowest, lamest form, for reasons I'll get to at the end of this review.

The movie operates from the standpoint of Jerry Falk, played by Jason Biggs (yeah remember him?????).  He is a writer who you'll never actually care about.  His only recognizable trait is his total lack of backbone towards all the negative forces in his life, including his girlfriend, played by a visibly regretful Christina Ricci.  He is friends with a HILARIOUSLY idiosyncratic jew, played by Allen himself.  Jason Biggs bitches about stuff for the entire movie, his girlfriend doesn't have sex with him and then has affairs, he moves to California.  That's literally the movie.

Of course, the plot is never really the point of any Woody Allen comedy, but is merely there to set up a framework for funny dialogue and references, but there's almost nothing of the sort in this film.  The worst offenders are probably Jason Biggs's endless fourth-wall monologues to the audience.  Five minutes do not go by  without all action stopping so Biggs can walk around in the set, talking in a faux clever manner about all his issues like a Franzen/DeLillo character after four generations of imbreeding.  Biggs is obviously not equipped to portray this sort of humor, treating the scenes like he's guest-hosting Punk'd.  While Biggs' lack of talent is part of the problem, he's also completely miscast in Allen's suffering Jew.  The film demands someone that looks like they've been shit on their entire life, and nothing about Biggs suggests a total wimp.  Ironically, Biggs might have been a funnier presence if Allen had given his character more bite than the whipped puppy dog that just rolls around whining for tru luv.  That is to say, Biggs would have done better in portraying the original type of Allen protagonist rather than some weird version created by equal parts pressure to make a more teen friendly film and Allen's own obvious misogyny in viewing the "nice guy" archetype as a character people should root for.

Pretty much all the other actors have their humor wasted too.  Ricci is talented, but her portrayal of Allen's nightmares about a dominant feminine personality never quite works.  Throughout the film, we're implored to view her as some mysterious siren that is irresistible to men, but while she's certainly attractive, one never reaches the dichotomy based on the scenes we're given.  For example, after a disastrous attempt by Biggs to rekindle the relationship in a hotel room leads to a visit to the ER, we're treated to a scene where she's examined by a doctor while she's writhing around and flirting with him.  In addition for the scene lasting far too long for the minuscule amount of cuckold humor it produces, it's hard to see why her actions make her so alluring.  There's a sort of a difference between sirens and sluts, guys.  Ricci does her best, but Allen's direction was obviously determined to make her into a one-note hag who is responsible for all of the problems in the relationship, so eventually she acquiesces and evilly quips about how she had sex with another dude to know whether she could have orgasms again.

Allen's character is the best in the film, but that's not a hard hurdle to jump.  Allen plays a wacky, paranoid Jew who miserably teaches at a public school and stockpiles guns and supplies for the return of the Nazis.  It's an amusing enough character, but as the film progresses and Allen gets progressively more violent towards the world and hateful towards Ricci's character, the humor is soured.  Alot of film critics wanted more of Allen's character, which honestly makes me wonder if they understood Allen's films.  It'd be as if Walken's character in Annie Hall suddenly had 40 more minutes of screen time.

All this makes me wonder who the audience in this movie is supposed to be.  The ostensible answer is the teen market, but while that's certainly how the studios marketed it, it's harder to see that as Allen's intent.  Many of the references are clearly not intended for the kids (for god's sake, there's a reference to The Exterminating Angel), and while I guess if you squint really hard, you could call it a romantic comedy, it is a damn black one.  At the same time, the relationships and characters are so one-note that no mature mind is really going to be tickled by what is going on.  Do you see where I'm going with this?

No, it's not aliens.

Moreso than alot of directors, Allen's always used his films as pretenses to help him deal with whatever issues present in his life.  We'd get to see the director's neurosis laid bare, we'd laugh at the inner mind of a funny dude, everything was cool.  I'm not sure if the process started earlier than Anything Else, but this film is a pretty awkward glimpse into someone who still believes he is funny, but is only capable of nervous distaste for everything around him. In retrospect, this helps explain Match Point, which was at least capable of matching a dark tone with a dark subject matter. Woody Allen doesn't care about whether you found this movie funny, this is his ten million dollar therapy session and I guess you can watch but it's going to cost you.

And while that's interesting from a psychological standpoint, Anything Else is still a shitty fucking comedy.

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